People often say that you never “get over” the loss of a child, but what is “getting over?” Is there such a thing?
I host a radio show called “The Grief Recovery Hour with Sharon Brubaker,” on KHTS and I recently had my sister call in to be live on air talking about the loss of her two sons.
My sister Erica lost her ten year old son Austin in 2006 and her son Donovan in 2015. I asked her what she thinks about that and she shared her thoughts.
“Of course if you don’t get help, you won’t recover, but when you reach out, start talking and opening up, it is possible to recover,” said Erica. After her loses, Erica has become a certified Grief Recovery Specialist.
Previous Episode: Things That Are Not Helpful To Say – The Grief Recovery Hour With Sharon Brubaker – August 8, 2018
“Recovery means moving past the soul crushing sadness that makes it hard to function,” explains Erica. “I describe it as carrying around a backpack full of rocks.”
Being recovered and having hope doesn’t mean that you will never feel sadness again. Grieving also includes the loss of hopes, dreams and expectations. Erica explains that she still feels sadness when she attends weddings and sees pictures of grandchildren, knowing she will never experience those things.
“Being recovered means talking about them all day long with a smile on my face and a song in my heart, as opposed to feeling like I could break down,” said Erica.
I guide people through a crazy or down time in their life, and I am truly honored to walk through the journey of grief recovery with my clients. At A time to grief, I work with clients to help them understand that unresolved grief is almost always associated with wishing things were better, different or more and that it can have to do with any unfulfilled hopes, dreams and expectations.
I am not only a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist—I am a griever. I teach in my program that grief is a normal and natural reaction to a loss of any kind. Yet, we were never taught how to grieve. Sadly, most of the information we are given immediately following a loss from family or friends is incorrect. It does little or nothing to help us feel better or to begin the healing process. So, we continue to search and search.
Reach out to me today for help, and we can walk through this together.
About Sharon Brubaker
Grief is individual and unique for every person. A person’s relationship to each aspect of their life is also unique. As such, the feelings and thoughts each person will have about the relationship that has been altered by death, divorce, or other reasons requires customized attention using proven skills and understanding.