When grief first hits right after a tragedy, you feel numb. Shortly after loved ones begin approaching you with advice and words of comfort.
We are not saying don’t come or don’t show up for that loved one. In deep times of grief we need people to be around us and have that supportive energy, but many times people don’t know what to say and they just say the first thing that comes out of their mouth.
I recently sat down on my weekly radio show, The Grief Recovery Hour, with my sister Erica Honore and we talked about how people showed up for us. Having and using words that deliver an accurate message to the griever are essential tools in helping someone overcome by grief.
Some important things to note:
- It is ok to not have the words. Just hug the griever, sit with them, and say you are sorry.
- Do not post anything on social media until the griever has. It is very disrespectful to notify friends and family by means of social media and not let the family make direct phone calls.
- It is ok to ask the griever what happened. Some people don’t think it’s appropriate to ask for fear of making the griever upset, but grievers need to talk.
- REACH OUT! Let people know you are there and you are thinking about them.
Related Article: Grief Is Not An Ugly Or Bad Word – The Grief Recovery Hour With Sharon Brubaker – August 29, 2018
I guide people through a crazy or down time in their life, and I am truly honored to walk through the journey of grief recovery with my clients.
At a time to grief, I work with clients to help them understand that unresolved grief is almost always associated with wishing things were better, different or more and that it can have to do with any unfulfilled hopes, dreams and expectations.
I am not only a Certified Grief Recovery Specialist—I am a griever. I teach in my program that grief is a normal and natural reaction to a loss of any kind.
Yet, we were never taught how to grieve. Sadly, most of the information we are given immediately following a loss from family or friends is incorrect. It does little or nothing to help us feel better or to begin the healing process. So, we continue to search and search.
Reach out to me today for help, and we can walk through this together.
About Sharon Brubaker
Grief is individual and unique for every person. A person’s relationship to each aspect of their life is also unique. As such, the feelings and thoughts each person will have about the relationship that has been altered by death, divorce, or other reasons requires customized attention using proven skills and understanding.